"Pag nagmamahal ka parang may confetti at glitters, parang may magic." Though I am not in love right now. I just feel like writing something I’ve heard from somebody inlove.
Hindi ko alam ang pakiramdam or maybe if I did, it was probably just a glimpse. I’ve heard that from somebody else and the way she said it, it’s like little girl being pleased with the greates magician of all. I wanted the feeling. I wanted to deeply know and understand how ‘magic’ works. But I realized maybe if I get the chance to fall in love, I would love the person not just the idea of magic. Not just the idea of love. And ‘magic’ is probably just the adoration of the idea of love and I don’t want that. Hopefully, you won’t too. :)
A disease that a person who leaves in a relationship always, always carries. It lies in the fact that you never felt the feeling of hanging by a thread and somebody just cut it off for you. And the worst part is, you fell. You felt pain not just because something has swollen but because something has been ripped open.
You never felt that. Hopefully, you won’t ‘cause it hurts like shit. And I felt her pain. She’s someone that plays a vital role in my life, so I always felt that pain in her back that she carries. And you never knew that. ‘Cause you are that insensitive.
Nice idea that you are not alone in doing school stuffs. But I hate it to the universe and back because sometimes I feel like the whole group make you do all bullshits and leave you to live their lives to the fullest. TWO WORDS FOR YOU BITCH, GO DIE. YOU DESERVE TO EAT MY MIDDLE FINGER. ....
Maybe no one is ever enough for everybody. No one is ever enough for anyone. Even you are not enough for yourself. No matter how we try to contain our feelings to be just right and to be right, you just can’t. I’ve tried so hard to change, but it isn’t enough. I’ve become a monster that lived inside a shell. I can’t escape. I’ve tried to loosen the grip of the chains but it’s just too tight. I can’t breathe. Then, I just realized maybe just maybe no matter how we flush the monster away it would return for vengeance. Maybe just maybe, we were never enough. Like you are, I wasn’t.
Memories creates our personalities. Back then, I was too sick of everyday. Waking up, doing the same shits. But then one morning you’ll open those damn eyes. Wishing that everything would go back. Go back to where it should be. Go back when I was who I am.
I have made a simplest mistake;
Simplest among the simplest mistakes.
Core of an eye is focused on me,
Its iris took away my glee.
Mouths where a dragon lays
Ears where tidal wave sways.
An error with the littlest reason,
Cuts deep that held all season.